I last posted in here three weeks ago, and things on the coronavirus front are even more dire. Maryland has a "stay at home order," which basically means Larry Hogan is taking this shit seriously and legally enforcing social distancing.
And just like 3 weeks ago, I've still been experiencing a roller coaster of emotions. On Twitter, Shannon Dingle, who lost her husband in a freak accident last year, named the emotion all of us have been going through as grief, and I was like, ya know what, I think she is on to something.
Of course she is. Our culture isn't great with grief, and even worse when the grief isn't over an actual death. But grappling with our sense of "normal" changing overnight is grief too. And it explains the emotional roller coaster: I keep cycling back and forth through the "stages," because grief isn't linear. I've arrived at acceptance a few times since three weeks ago, only to go back to denial or anger or sadness.
The anger has been interesting. There has been the (perhaps petty?) anger over the overall crumbliness of life with necessitated social distancing, over the lack of choice and the frustration of canceled plans, but then there is also anger over the incompetence of our administration and over how unprepared America was to deal with a pandemic even before Trump got into office. And the anger at the partiers flaunting social distance, although if I am going to be honest, and I am because this is my blog, I'm also angry at those who in THEIR anger become smug and self-righteous about staying home. And the people who spread misinformation online. Yeah. Lots of anger for lots of reasons.
But I do arrive at moments of acceptance. And I've also been heartened by human resilience and the way people find joy and beauty even in the midst of panic, uncertainty, illness, and, well, crap. On Monday, a former high school classmate of mine live-streamed an impromptu "socially distanced" wedding (she had to cancel her plans for an April wedding but wanted to seal the deal anyway.) It was her and her new husband, a few family members (fewer than 8), and the priest in a church parking lot, and it was somehow more beautiful than a run-of-the-mill wedding with a hundred guests.
And then there was the video of the woman singing Leonard Cohen's "Hallelujah" from a balcony in Italy. Such a beautiful song to begin with, and even more poignant in these tumultuous times.
And now some entertainment notes that DON'T have directly to do with the coronavirus, because my mind needs a respite once in a while.
1) I finished reading "The Woman At the Window." And while I said this wasn't about coronavirus, I do have to note that reading a novel about an agoraphobic felt weirdly timely during the coronavirus stay-at-home order. But anyway...while this novel was extremely similar to another thriller about a woman with mental health and drinking issues who witnesses a crime, "The Girl on the Train" (even the titles are similar), I felt this one was better written and more compelling than "The Girl on the Train." A film adaptation of "The Woman at the Window" was supposed to be released in May, but at this point, who knows?
2) I've also been getting in to the miniseries adaptation of "Little Fires Everywhere" lately. I think I may even like it more than the book. But among other things, the 90s-era soundtrack is awesome. Especially the Alanis Morrisete additions. "Uninvited" fit the scene perfectly, but Izzy playing a violin rendition of "You Oughta Know" was even more perfect.
