Blah Blah Blah Gay Marriage and Children

Since the Supreme Court is arguing the Constitutionality of DOMA and California's Proposition 8, and gay marriage is the talk of facebook, I figured it was time to enter the fray and flesh out my thoughts with a blog post. The way I see it, civil marriage is a civil right for ANY two committed adults who wish to share a life together. This is separate from any religious definition of marriage, and would not force religious organizations to bless any union they are opposed to. As a Christian, I differ from many of my brothers and sisters in Christ in believing that God sees the love and commitment behind the vows of marriage rather than the genders of those making the vows, but that's beside the point. What's being debated now is a civil institution existing within a secular and pluralistic society.

So any religious belief with regards to homosexuality is irrelevant to the SCOTUS. Apart from that, the main argument I keep hearing from social conservatives is basically "think of the children," and I don't think it holds up. What are the rights of a child? To be raised in a secure and loving household, yes. To their biological mother and father? Not when such people are often unfit to raise them. To be raised by two parents of the opposite sex, regardless of biology? Again, one's gender has nothing to do with one's fitness to be a parent, and all credible and unbiased studies show that children raised by gay couples fare no differently than children raised by straight couples.

But what really got me was the graphic to the left.

This is Mitt, who is infamous for talking about how 47% of the people think they are entitled to freebies from the government like food and shelter and healthcare.

So apparently people, including children, have no inherent right to the basic necessities of  life, but children DO have the right to a mother and a father? A right to be raised by two parents, as long as they are of opposite gender?

Someone's priorities are a little screwed up.

Yes, same-sex couples are marrying under the law in Massachusetts. And same-sex couples are forming partnerships and raising children across America. They aren't going anywhere. All they are asking for is the same civil rights and recognition as opposite-sex couples.

I Intensely, and I Mean Intensely, Dislike Cops...

and here's my story as to why (warning: major rant to follow).

So tonight ended up taking a majorly bad turn. I went to the movies with a friend who lives in Southern PG County around 8. I was fairly tired after the movie got out, but I still had to drop off my friend after giving her a ride and check in on the cats I've been cat-sitting for (I do morning and evening visits b/c one of the cats has a thyroid condition and has to take a pill twice daily). I went to check on the cats and when I started my car back up, I discovered I had a flat. It may have been leaking since I hit the curb at the cash station earlier; I'm still not sure. But I'm a pretty stereotypical female when it comes to car trouble; I have yet to learn to change a tire myself. And did I mention I was tired? And that I just wanted to go home and go to bed? I decided to see whether it was drivable and then pull into a nearby shopping center and decide what to do from there, figuring that between finding someone to help me and my roadside assistance I would be ok.

Well, little old me naive me never suspected that I would be pegged a drunk driver. I had passed several police cars and a small group of people by the entrance of the shopping center. When a cop pulled up behind me, I (again with the naivety) thought maybe he saw that I needed help. Instead he asked me if I had been drinking.

I answered no, I hadn't had a drop of alcohol today. I mean I understand that it's the eve of St. Patrick's Day and all, so they're gonna be extra vigilant. But someone driving on a flat with her emergency flashers on, and then pulling into a parking lot? I tell him that I was out, realized I had a flat, and am just tired and frustrated and upset. He clearly doesn't believe me; asking me at least three times whether I had been drinking "even a little." Clearly I must have been, I mean why else would I be driving on a flat tire?

In don't deal with cops well.  In my various dealings (including after a break-in at my parents' beach house), I never have. I just find them to be really...intimidating. I find situations where I have to deal with the police to be upsetting to begin with, and of course they aren't very empathetic to my being upset. I understand that they are used to dealing with, well, criminals, and so they're going to be a good deal cynical. They're expecting lying; they're expecting guilt. But there's something rather humiliating about being treated like a law-breaker without firm evidence to the contrary.

I had to go through the whole sobriety test shebang for the first time in my life. Walking along a line, standing on one foot...things that are difficult to do even when sober if you are upset and tired. Then they finally gave me the breathalizer and let me go. The worst part is they didn't even offer to help me with my tire before they left, though they did wait around while I called my mom for a ride. Did they wait to see that I made it out of the parking lot safely? Nope.

So I left my car in the parking lot and will deal with that tomorrow (actually later today). I just really need to sleep my anger and frustration and upset off.

Edited to add: Huh. It's actually almost 2 am on St. Patrick's Day now. I have no idea how to change the time  in blogger. *shrugs*

Dancing with the Stars Season 16 Cast

For a couple years now, my mom, one of her best friends (who I refer to as my "Aunt Julie" because she's practically family), and I have had the hobby of making cast predictions for Dancing with the Stars. Seriously, we'll have Thanksgiving dinner and then write up a whole list of predictions, only to lose it by the time the cast announcements come around. I'm not nearly as big a fan of the show as my mom is, but its fun to see if any of our predictions come true. (And so far, I don't think a single one has, but it's more about noticing trends in the pics than anything else.)

So, without further ado, here's the list of Season 16 stars and my commentary:

• Aly Raisman - You can always on DWTS to have several Olympians in the cast, usually those who recently medaled, and they usually do pretty well. The discipline that any athlete develops seems to translate well to dancing. Will be interested in seeing how Raisman does on this show. 
• Andy Dick - Don't really have any thoughts here...
• D.L. Hughely - Another comedian. Comedians on DWTS tend to ham it up, since comedy is what they do, more than get into the technicalities of learning the various styles of ballroom dance. We'll see, though. 
• Dorothy Hamill - Another Olympian, but a more veteran one than Raisman. As I said, Olympians tend to do really well on this show, particularly gymnasts and figure skaters. And the musicality of figure skating gives her an advantage in a competition like DWTS. 
• Ingo Rademacher - Because the cast must include at least one soap opera star I have never heard of before. 
• Jacoby Jones - Well, here's who I'm most rooting for, because Ravens!!! Maryland!!! Superbowl win!!! A season or two ago, I had been pulling for Michael Oher, because his whole story and the fame that The Blind Side brought him, but hey, any Raven will do. Football players, like Olympians of all stripes, tend to do well on DTWS, and there's just something about watching someone known for such a "macho" sport ballroom dance. On the other hand, DWTS usually casts NFL and NBA players who are at the end of their careers, so maybe this doesn't bode so well for Jones on the field...
• Kellie Pickler - Honestly I thought Pickler was merely mediocre on American Idol; she was most notable for making "dumb blonde" statements ala Jessica Simpson and for being called a "saucy minx" by Simon Cowell. However, this makes her a much better pic for DTWS than someone like fellow American Idol country star Carrie Underwood. We'll see if she can dance, but I'm not expecting much...
• Lisa Vanderpump - Apparently she's best known for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. DTWS has to have a reality "star" in the mix, and it's certainly better than a Kardashian or someone from the Jersey Shore cast. Plus she's a restaurateur, tapping into the array of celebrity chefs and foodie stars that DTWS has been largely ignoring. 
• Victor Ortiz - Somehow I can see him doing well on this show. 
• Wynnona Judd - They are big on the country stars this year. I feel like one of the Judd sisters may have been on one of our lists, actually. But I can't remember. 
• Zendaya - I had never heard of her before, but Zendaya fits right in to the DTWS trend of having a Disney star on each season. Born in 1996, she's the season's youngest contestant, but as a singer/actor, her combination of musicality and performance experience gives her an edge.

One thing I find to be a relief about this cast line-up: there are no politicians (or children of politicians). I'm sorry, but despite her mother's desire for fame, Sarah Palin is not a "star." Nor should being in a position of authority make someone a celebrity. Let's separate entertainment and politics a bit. However, there are some cultural icons (e.g. Buzz Aldrin) that are the exception. On that note: I would like to see Mark Kelly (retired astronaut and Gabrielle Giffords' husband) on DWTS. Season 17?

Superbowl 47: Ravens, Power Outages and Commercials

As a native Marylander, this year was the first year I was actually as excited for the actual Super Bowl game as for the commercials. It turned out to be a crazy game: the Ravens kicked major butt in the first half, and then, after the Beyonce/Destiny's Child halftime show...the lights went out. This ended up delaying the remainder of the game for a good half-hour, and the Ravens lost momentum when they resumed play. In the end, though, they won, beating the SF 49ers by 34-31. Congrats, Ravens.

But back to the ads. Honestly, Super Bowl advertising tends to get a little stale. It's always the same products (Doritos, beer, various automobiles), because that's where the money is. Moreover, the advertisers tend to sacrifice coherence for cleverness or humor, resulting in ads that use crazy plot devices in an aim to sell products that are only tangentially-related. However, there was a good crop of ads this year. Here are my 10 favorites, saving the best for last.

10) Volkswagen "Get Happy." This ad, featuring a white man going around speaking with a Jamaican accent, achieved what it set out to do: it made me happy. Will I go out and buy a VW now? No, but the ad still made me happy.




9)Babylandia! This 2014 Kia Sorento ad depicted a dad trying to explain to his young child where babies come from. His answer: the mysterious planet Babylandia. The ad had some clever visuals and neatly tied in the Sorento's "It has the answer to everything" tagline.

8) Taco Bell's "Viva Young." I liked this one largely because Fun's "We Are Young"  in Spanish: even better than Fun's "We are Young" in English. Also, rebellious elderly folks sell.

7) M & Ms "Anything for Love." The M&Ms commercials always make me laugh, and I love this song.



6) PSY's "Gangnam Style" for pistachios. The pistachios commercials are always culturally relevant (the Simpsons, keyboard cat), so it figures they would bring out PSY's viral hit for the Super Bowl. I have a bit of a problem, however. I ran across someone online who said it sounds like he is singing "Condom Style," so I hear this every time I hear the song now.



5) Ram "God Made Farmers." This was an odd commercial. Honestly when I first saw it I thought it was going to be a political message about supporting American farmers...and then it got to the end and showed a Ram truck. So apparently they are trying to sell Ram to farmers. It was definitely a memorable ad, though, with the narrator's deep, haunting voice, and it's almost somber tone stood out among the funny/not-so-funny ads. 

4)  "It's Only Weird if It Doesn't Work." It was the night for Stevie Wonder, who was featured in several different "voodoo" themed ads for Bud Lite. This one, with the Ravens and 49ers voodoo dolls, was my favorite.



3) Tide Montana Miracle Stain. Hilarious. My favorite part was the wife who obliterates the "miracle stain" with Tide and gives the clean jersey back to her husband, saying "Go Ravens." Go Ravens indeed.





2) Paul Rudd and Seth Rogen for Samsung. The ad that actually aired towards the end of the commercial was clever, but I think I like this take better. Rudd and Rogen are asked to develop as Samsung ad for the Super Bowl but aren't allowed to actually name the game, teams, etc., resulting in lines like "San Francisco 50-1-ers and Baltimore Blackbirds."

1) "Brotherhood," my favorite ad of the night.The Budweiser Clydesdales are just classic. And adorable. Especially baby Clydesdales. *Squeeeee*

Rant Miss-attributed to Bill Cosby and My Response

So I came across the below on Facebook, and the more I looked at it, the more it was pissing me off, until I thought, hey, that's what my blog is for, getting out things that piss me off in a hopefully respectful and coherent way. Well, maybe not always respectful, but sometimes snark is warranted.

This has been attributed to Bill Cosby, but Snopes says it's not his. Thank God, because I do have respect for Bill Cosby.

So, here's the strawman-filled "social commentary" and my response in bold:

I'm 83. Except for brief period in the 50's when I was doing my National
Service, I've worked hard since I was 17. Except for some some serious
health challenges, I put in 50-hour weeks, and didn't call in sick in nearly
40 years. I made a reasonable salary, but I didn't inherit my job or my
income, and I worked to get where I am. Given the economy, it looks as
though retirement was a bad idea, and I'm tired. Very tired. 

I'm tired of being told that I have to "spread the wealth" to people who
don't have my work ethic. I'm tired of being told the government will take
the money I earned, by force if necessary, and give it to people too lazy
to earn it. 

Uhhh.....good for you? Do you think you are owed a pat on the back for your hard work? Isn't that rather entitled, and shouldn't hard work be it's own reward? Snark aside, I do understand your pride in hard work. However, know that there are people who put in that same hard work at multiple low-wage jobs just to make ends meet. I think perhaps they might be as tired as you, if not more. 

And good for you not calling in sick, but I hope you have some gratitude for the good health you have apparently been blessed with. If you were going to work sick and spreading germs instead of taking a sick day lest you be labeled lazy, then shame. At least you had sick days to use. 

I'm tired too...tired of the assumption that the poor are poor because they are lazy and unwilling to work hard. 

I'm tired of being told that Islam is a "Religion of Peace," when every day I
can read dozens of stories of Muslim men killing their sisters, wives and
daughters for their family "honor"; of Muslims rioting over some slight
offense; of Muslims murdering Christian and Jews because they aren't
"believers"; of Muslims burning schools for girls; of Muslims stoning
teenage rape victims to death for "adultery"; of Muslims mutilating the
genitals of little girls; all in the name of Allah, because the Qur'an and
Shari'a law tells them to.

I'm tired of being told that out of "tolerance for other cultures" we must let
Saudi Arabia and other Arab countries use our oil money to fund mosques
and Madrasa Islamic schools to preach hate in Australia , New Zealand ,
UK, America and Canada , while no one from these countries are allowed to
fund a church, synagogue or religious school in Saudi Arabia or any other
Arab country to teach love and tolerance.. 

I am Christian, albeit a progressive/liberal-leaning one. I bristle at the hatred that goes on in the name of my religion, so I similarly bristle when Islam is given a bad name by zealous fundamentalists who in no way represent moderate faithful Muslims. Any religion can be used to promote hatred, violence and destruction or love, so I don't understand why you think "churches and synagogues" teach love and tolerance but Islamic schools and temples promote hate. 

And "our" oil money? Perhaps maybe we should stop depending on Islamic militants for oil. 

Finally, the populations of Australia, etc. are much more religiously diverse, thankfully so, than is Saudi Arabia. This is part of our freedom of religion. 
I'm tired of being told I must lower my living standard to fight global
warming, which no one is allowed to debate.

I personally am always open to reasonable and respectable debate, but why does everything for you boil down to your personal living standard? Climate change, whether man-made or not, is pretty established among most scientists, and if we ARE able to do something about it and fail to, then everyone's standard of living will decline. 

Everyone. As in, you are not the only one whose needs and wants need to be taken into consideration. 
I'm tired of being told that drug addicts have a disease, and I must help
support and treat them, and pay for the damage they do. Did a giant germ
rush out of a dark alley, grab them, and stuff white powder up their noses
or stick a needle in their arm while they tried to fight it off? 

As someone who has witnessed people I care about struggle with addiction, I can tell you that it is in fact a disease, a devastating one. No, that doesn't absolve addicts of all responsibility for their actions, but it's still a disease. The addict made the choice to start using, whatever compelled that choice, but after that it becomes harder and harder to quit not only psychologically but also physiologically. Hence, disease. 

I'm tired of hearing wealthy athletes, entertainers and politicians of all
parties talking about innocent mistakes, stupid mistakes or youthful
mistakes, when we all know they think their only mistake was getting
caught. I'm tired of people with a sense of entitlement, rich or poor. 

So am I, but I wish we could admit that all people make mistakes, even you. The key is taking responsibility for your mistakes. Glad you could admit it's not only, or primarily, the poor with a sense of entitlement. 

I'm really tired of people who don't take responsibility for their lives and
actions. I'm tired of hearing them blame the government, or discrimination
or big-whatever for their problems. 

*Shrugs* Yeah, I get it, I am pro-responsibility too, but life is complex, not black-and-white. Most people's problems are a mix of their own choices and environmental factors beyond their control. 

I'm also tired and fed up with seeing young men and women in their teens and
early 20's be-deck them selves in tattoos and face studs, thereby making
themselves unemployable and claiming money from the Government. 

I don't have any tattoos myself, but I am tired of anti-tattoo prejudice. What is it that offends you so much about them? Virtually all the people I know with tattoos, and I know several, are able to cover them when working with the public or in a corporate environment. Same with studs. My brother has a lip ring; he removes it when a situation calls for professional dress. People who do have large and/or visible tattoos tend to get employment in environments acceptable of them. Someone needs to work in the tattoo parlors, after all. I have never in my life heard of anyone claiming government assistance because they are "unemployable because of tattoos and face studs." 

Yes, I'm damn tired. But I'm also glad to be 83.. Because, mostly, I'm not
going to have to see the world these people are making. I'm just sorry for
my granddaughter and their children. Thank God I'm on the way out and not
on the way in. 

So you have enormous prejudice against "these people." Are "these people" the poor, addicts, tattooed people, Muslims, athletes, or just anyone you happen to dislike? Newsflash, being 83 does not mandate having contempt of society except your own kin. 


There is no way this will be widely publicized, unless each of us
sends it on!

This is your chance to make a difference.


" I'm 83 and I'm tired. If you don't agree you are part of the problem!


I can agree that you are tired. Whoever you actually are. And there is a chance this might actually be widely posted, but I'm not sure to the effect you were going for. Glad I "made a difference;" I feel better now. 

American Idol Auditions

I've been watching American Idol for 12 seasons now (yeesh), and every year when I watch the auditions there are contestants that I really like but then forget all about after Hollywood week. So this year I decided I would keep track of them here. I missed the first day of auditions, but here are my favorites from the rest:

From the Chicago auditions:

Mariah Pulice, who described her journey as a recovering anorexic. Yes, it was a typical Idol "sob story," but an emotionally compelling one that I'm sure many in the audience related to. I was really excited that she chose to sing my favorite Beatles' song, Let It Be, which I always find so powerful and moving. As the get judges noted, the strength of her performance was the emotion that came through in her delivery.

Isabell Parell, just 15 years old. When she asked Keith Urban to sing a duet with her, I was a little annoyed, but she was singing Baby It's Cold Outside, and it is a duet. She was actually cute and charming, and what's more, she could sing. Her soulful voice was well-suited to the song and different than that of every other pop-star wannabe out there.

Kiara Lanier. When she said she sang for an Obama fundraiser, I thought she's gotta be good, and she was, managing to pull off Celine Dion's The Prayer with beautiful tone and control. The only thing that annoyed me was how she stuck a billion runs in practically every line, but that seems typical of a lot of today's singers. I can definitely see her in the top 12.

Clifton Duffin, who, according to his story, had never sung in front of anyone before, not even his parents. Well, his parents were in the audience for his audition, when he proved to them and to the world that he can indeed sing. Yeah, I'm a sucker, but it was moving watching his mother's reaction to hearing him for the first time.

Lazaro Arbos, who revealed a severe stutter when he spoke but smoothly delivered a beautiful rendition of the Simon & Garfunkel classic Bridge Over Troubled Water.

From the Charlotte auditions:

Twenty-seven year-old Brian Rittenberg, who also sang Let It Be. Is that gonna be the song of the auditions this season? His rendition was a lot different than Mariah Pulice's, with more soul and rasp. I think I preferred Pulice's version actually, but he wasn't bad.

High school student Isabel Gonzalez, who was nominated by her aunt. She sang a Sam Cooke song, and if I hadn't known, I would not have thought this girl was only 16.

Taisha Bethea,a young black rocker chick who sings in a band. Yes, "black girls can rock," as Randy said. The judges were torn on her but Keith Urban cast the deciding vote and sent her to Hollywood. It could be interesting to see how far she goes in the competition.

Formerly homeless Rodney Barber, who sang Edwin McCain's I'll Be with soul and a lot of dynamic range. 

Seretha Guinn, who came to the auditions with her (adorable) 3-year-old daughter. I have to say I was a little disturbed when she revealed that her little girl (key word "little") "idolizes" Nicki Minaj. But Seritha was at the auditions to surprise her boyfriend, who had recently been in a serious accident. She sang a jazzy, non-rap version of the Fresh Prince of Bel Air theme song, in addition to a bit of Lee Ann Rhymes' How Do I Live. The former was probably the most unique song choice of the night, but it was the latter  that really showed off the beauty of her voice.

From the Baton Rouge auditions:


Charlie Askew, who described himself as having "always been socially awkward," but said music was his outlet. Socially awkward or not, this kid (17-years-old) was endearing. He sang Breakthrough, a Queen song that I do not actually know, and then Nature Boy, which I do know thanks to the Moulin Rouge soundtrack. I'm totally rooting for him.

Maddie Assell, nominated by her grandmother. Another one of those old-fashioned/soulful voices. She sang a Beatles song (that I was once again unfamiliar with; I need to expand my music horizons), but her voice reminds me of Adele's in some ways. Oh, wait..she just said she was influenced by Adele and Keith replied that he doesn't think she sounds like her or like any other artist. Whatever. I still hear the Adele, and that's not a bad thing.

Paul Jolley, who sang a Rascall Flats song. He was cute, had a really strong voice, and sounded like could do well in a variety of genres beyond just country. Oh, and he was cute ;).


Dustin Watts, a fireman and another country singer who I, like Nicki Minaj, can already see as a star in the genre.

Bernell Taylor,who lived through Hurrican Katrina. He sang a song from The Color Purple and seemed to have an extremely versatile voice: I can hear him doing old-school R & B, gospel, musical theater...

MLK Day and Inauguration Day

In honor of MLK Day, I give you a collection of some of my favorite quotes from Dr. King.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you can't see the whole staircase."

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

"We must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope."

"We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools."

 "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

 "The good neighbor looks beyond the external accidents and discerns those inner qualities that make all men human and, therefore, brothers."

 "Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars... Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

Watching President Obama's inaugural speech from the comfort of home: he is quite the inspiring speaker himself. And whatever your views of the President, may we use these next four years to come together as a nation rather than focusing on what divides us.