Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Law and Order and Williams Syndrome

I  somewhat recently became addicted to Law and Order (especially but not limited to SVU), but I am still catching up on never-seen re-runs. So I was exited to see the description of the 2007  Law and Order: SVU episode "Savant," in which a girl with Willams Syndrome is the only witness to her mother's beating. My cousin has Williams Syndrome, so I was curious to see how accurately the not-so-common disorder was represented and hoping that it wouldn't be overly sensationalized, as Law and Order is wont to do sometimes.

As expected, the episode was a pretty good mix of the reality-based and the sensationalized. Key to the plot is the witness (Katie Nicholson) identifying the assailant via voice thanks to her perfect pitch. This is an exaggeration, but people with Williams Syndrome tend to have musical gifts coexisting with mental retardation. In fact, my cousin attended a school, Berkshire Music Academy,  uniquely designed for students with Williams Sydrome.

Also spot-on was Katie's extremely social and friendly nature; while in some ways people with Williams Syndrome have trouble with the nuances of appropriate social behavior, they are usually extremely empathetic and able to read people's emotions. A scene in the first five minutes of the episode, where Katie attempts to give Detective Stabler a hug because he "seems upset," made me chuckle and think of my cousin.

Other details in the episode make it clear the the writers did their homework on Williams Syndrome: Katie has heart problems; she tells the detective that some people think she is an elf (because of their unique facial features, people with Williams Syndrome are often described as elf-like).

There were some awkward moments in the episode, like when Katie mimics an orgasm when recollecting to the court an encounter she overheard between her mother and her mother's lover. And  because I felt extremely protective of Katie, I wish the detectives and later the judge had been more patient and understanding of her Williams-typical behaviors like over-affection. But this is probably accurate to the way a lot of people react to the disorder. Overall, it was a positive and not altogether unrealistic portrayal, and I'm grateful for this type of media attention being given to this rare disorder. Hopefully more people who don't have someone in their life with Williams Syndrome know at least a little about it thanks to Law and Order.

Monday, December 29, 2014

Santa: Lie or Developmentally Normal Fantasy?

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus...

wrote the New York Sun back in 1897.

But wait, some would say. Why would they lie to children like that, and why do we lie to children by perpetuating Santa Claus?

This was a conversation I had with a co-worker a few weeks ago, and it brought me back to an article I wrote a few years ago for the now-defunct Yahoo Contributor Network saying what I felt the need to write about again: calling Santa a "lie" totally misses the point that the New York Sun understood.

Telling children about Santa and letting them believe in Santa isn't lying to them, it's teaching them a myth/story/legend that has resonating truths that go far beyond childhood.

Santa, of course, is based on the 3rd century Greek St. Nicholas. But just because the jolly fat man living at the North Pole isn't real doesn't mean there is harm in children believing in his existence. After all, children naturally believe in a lot of things that aren't real: monsters under the bed, fairies, the Easter bunny, the list goes on. Believing in the reality of these myths is just what children do, and it is adults who try to impose their rational minds on children's instead of appreciating the gifts of their youthful spirits.

These are all beliefs that children grow out of in time, but there is no harm in allowing them. And I have never met anyone who has been emotionally scarred by finding out Santa wasn't real, nor anyone who distrusted adults because of the "lie." They simply shed their belief in time, some sooner and some later, as their understanding of reality vs. fantasy blossomed. And that can happen without shunning the fantasy.

After all, there is meaning and wonder behind the fantasy. Not only depression but also cynicism can create in adults a strict rationality that forgets that there is always meaning behind myth. So let the children believe, and stop referring to Santa Claus as a "lie." 




Sunday, November 16, 2014

I Officially Have a Love-Hate Relationship With This Time of Year...

Things I Love

First off, it's just beautiful out, with the leaves changing and such.




And the weather is often quite lovely, a nice temperate moderation between the sweltering of summer and the dead chill of winter...at least in the earlier months of fall.

I do love all the festivities too, even though Thanksgiving seems to get swallowed up by Christmas.

I love me some pumpkin-spice everything, and some apple cider donuts...

Things I Hate 

The worst thing about fall to me is the reminder that winter is almost here. Yeah, I don't like winter. I'm not a fan of the cold, and when it starts getting dark at dinner time I tend to get depressed. So November is always meh for me in that way.

I also don't like that I just plain don't know how to dress for this time of year. Layers work, I guess, but I find the huge gaps in temperature between day and night to be irritating.

And I can't stand how dry my skin is all the time. Usually my legs are the worst, but the past couple of days my lips have been chapped as hell too. Ugh.

So, yeah, I can't say I totally love fall. Love-hate is much more like it.

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

I Still Love U2...


We got language so we can communicate
Religion so I can love and hate
Music so I can exaggerate my pain, and give it a name... 






Baby every dog on the street
Knows that we’re in love with defeat
Are we ready to be swept off our feet
And stop chasing
Every breaking wave?

Thursday, November 6, 2014

Coping With Depression

In the wake of Robin Williams' suicide, more celebrities are coming forward with their battles with depression. The latest is Wayne Brady, who I've long been a fan of from Who's Line Is It Anyway.

 As someone who has dealt with depression firsthand, it is refreshing to see people like Brady speaking out. The stigma needs to be erased, and people need to know that they are not alone. People need to know that there are others who arrive at the other end of the tunnel.

 Of course, I am a firm believer in medication, in addition to talk therapy, for those who need it. After all, we wouldn't tell a diabetic not to take insulin, and the brain is no different than any other organ in terms of malfunctioning. However, depression is psychological, physiological, mental, emotional, and spiritual, and as such requires holistic approaches to treatment/daily management. And taking time to care for one's mental health on a daily basis is important for everyone, depression or not.

My friend Athena recently wrote a list of ways to cope with depression. She doesn't have a blog (uses facebook notes), otherwise I would link. The following are some of her suggestions combined with my own, with any direct quotes credited to her:

Exercise!
Cardiovascular exercise releases "happy hormones" known as endorphins, and exercise in general is good for the mind and spirit as well as the body. While it can be hard to "get moving" when depressed, setting time for regular exercise can increase feelings of competency and agency as well as increasing overall mood.

Better yet, exercise outside when you can. "Sunlight does a mind good," and although it can be hard to get outside in the colder months, any of that Vitamin D you can get is a good thing especially at that time of year.

Dancing is also great exercise to tackle depression. As Athena notes,  "it is good exercise and usually it is hard to be down when dancing, so choose activities where you brain has to follow a healthy body."

Also try yoga; yoga poses are known to quiet the mind and soothe anxiety.

Remember That You Need People
Depression can cause people from isolating themselves from those who love them, but this only makes things worse. So try to say yes to social engagements, and seek out close friends and trusted confidants to open up to. But stay mindful of how others' unhealthy or toxic behaviors rub off on you, and set firm boundaries when needed. The key is finding people who lift you up and limiting interactions that bring you down.

Practice Good Self-Care 
Take good care of your mind, body, and spirit. Along with healthy exercise, eating well and getting adequate sleep are essential for managing depression. And taking time to not only care for basic hygiene, but even dress up will leave you feeling better about yourself, even when you'd rather lounge in pajamas all day.

Limit excess caffeine, alcohol, and sugar. Technically, I'm not supposed to drink while on my antidepressant; however, my psychiatrist told me that a drink or two a week is not problematic. I've never been a huge drinker, so it's easy for me to limit my consumption. But while alcohol may seem to give a quick emotional fix, it is addictive for many and not helpful as a long-term coping mechanism for any. Caffeine and sugar likewise provide a momentary high followed often by a crash; for many including myself caffeine can add to anxiety so I try (often unsuccessfully...) to limit it.

Think Positive
Yes, no one is "positive" 24-7, let alone those with clinical depression. But we do have a choice of what we focus our mental energies on. I used to think of gratitude lists as hokey and kind of phony, but they really do help me keep my mind of what is good in my life, regardless of how I am feeling.

Doing a good turn for others can also help lift depressive systems; not only will you make someone else's day, but shifting the focus from self is mood lifting in and of itself.

Make Positive Media Choices 
In college I sought out a lot of music that actually increased my depression. Music and all the arts are amazing expressions of human experience and emotion, but as Athena notes, while some music and other media can be cathartic, over time consumption of too much "negative" media can leave you stuck. Instead find media that soothe your spirit. (My all-time favorite therapeutic song is The Beatles' Let it Be. Also
remember that "laughter truly is often the best medicine;" seek out shows, films, and people that lift you up.

Again, none of this is a substitute for clinical treatment of depression involving medication and/therapy, but in conjunction these ways of positive self-care can help anyone stay grounded and stable.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

Goodreads Book Review: Gone Girl

Gone GirlGone Girl by Gillian Flynn
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Gillian Flynn's Gone Girl is a #1 New York Times bestseller which has now been adapted into a film starring Ben Affleck. The novel's popularity should come as no surprise - after a few false starts, Flynn takes the reader on a twisted ride in which nothing and no one is as it seems.

The novel opens on the 5th wedding anniversary of Amy Elliott and Nick Dunne, who have recently moved to Missouri from New York City. The tone, rather than one of happy anticipation, is immediately ominous - and then we find out Amy has disappeared.

Nick insists he is innocent, but as detectives investigate and details unfold, his story and his nervous behavior begin to look more and more suspicious, and we witness the unraveling of what he tries to convince the public is a happy marriage. But Nick and Amy's is not just the ordinary marriage gone sour, but, as we learn, something much more sinister.

After the initial suspense (the girl is gone!), the early chapters of Gone Girl stalled a bit for me, seeming to get weighed down in insignificant details. But the mystery unfolded, things that seemed implausible, cheesy, or insignificant took on new significance. Take the Amazing Amy children's book series through which Amy's parents have amassed a fortune. The books, frankly, sound ridiculous - but through them, the Elliotts have created an idealized, fantasy version of their daughter. "Amazing Amy" is a girl and later young woman who always has the right answer, always does the right thing, and living in the shadow of her "amazing" counterpart serves as motivation for much of what "real" Amy does.

Through her use of unreliable narration, Flynn masterfully screws with the reader's head. The story is told alternately by Nick in real time and by Amy in a series of diary entries dated from 2005, when she first meets Nick, to shortly before her disappearance. Both Nick and Amy are prone to frequent omissions and outright lies, and soon the reader doesn't know whose story to believe.

Flynn manages to do many things with Gone Girl. The story is as much a psychological thriller as a classic whodunit story. It also serves as an interesting commentary on the media circus surrounding "unsolved mysteries" and crime stories, from the Ellen Abbot show (think Nancy Grace) to the sleazy defense attorney Nick hires to the ever-shifting public opinion and the paparazzi perpetually parked on Nick's lawn. It even delves into gender relations in both subtle and more overt ways - the most overt being Nick's misogynistic, Alzheimer's riddled father, prone to uncoherent rants against "bitches" who have wronged him. (Note: major spoilers in the link prior).

I've come across a lot of people who really did not like the ending of Gone Girl, which I won't spoil. I'll depart from popular opinion here. I can't say I "enjoyed" the novel's ending (or in some ways, lack of an ending). But in some ways it seemed perfectly fitting to the story that the ending would be as ominous, foreboding, and uncertain as the beginning. After all, Gone Girl is a story that sticks in your mind long after it is "finished."


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Monday, August 11, 2014

Goodreads Book Review: The Giver

The Giver (The Giver #1)The Giver by Lois Lowry
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I figure that now that the film version of The Giver is almost out, it's time for me to write a review of the book. I'm going to try to keep this about just the book - if I see the movie I'm going to try to evaluate that on it's own standing even though I'm not entirely pleased with some of the choices they've apparently made with it. I'm also going to just review The Giver on its own as a novel, even though it's the first in a four-book series. I finally did get around to reading the other books in the series, and though they take things in an interesting direction and provide some closure that The Giver on its own lacks, in some ways I prefer The Giver as its own independent story.

I read this book when I was 13, and it is one of the books or maybe the book from childhood that has made the most lasting impression on me. It's just such a simply written, yet powerful story, written at a level suitable for middle schoolers but with themes much more mature than the average young adult novel.

In drawing the reader into protagonist Jonas' world, Lois Lowry shows that sometimes the simplest writing is the most evocative. Jonas is a twelve-year-old boy, and in some ways he seems like a typical preteen boy, but in the community he lives in, everything is perfect and orderly. There is no war, hardship, or poverty, and everyone knows their place. Their future is set out by the community leaders.

But as the novel opens prior to the ceremony where the "Twelves" will receive their vocational assignments, Jonas is feeling apprehensive. And when he receives the role of "The Receiver" to be trained under the wise, aged "Giver," his perfect world is turned upside down.

Jonas's role as the Receiver is to receive memories from "the time before." Every time he meets with the Giver, he receives a memory of something his community no longer has. These memories start out simple - pets, Christmas, sledding - and gradually become more poignant and emotional as Jonas experiences everything from familial love to loss, fear, and pain. As he continues with the Giver, Jonas begins to question all that he has accepted about his community and his life.

I think the reason The Giver works so well is that the reader experiences everything with Jonas. So when Jonas first begins to see flickers of color (yes, all color was stricken from the community in the name of sameness) we imagine what it would be like not to know the color red. From little details that we take for granted to powerful emotions, Lowry makes us question what we would really trade away in search of a "perfect" world.

Yes, some things about Jonas's community don't "make sense." I'm not entirely clear how they have removed color from the community, how memories are transmitted from the Giver to Jonas, etc. And then there are the pills that every community resident takes when they experience their first "stirrings" (sexual urges). I had thought these pills were strictly for controlling or suppressing their sexuality, but both The Giver and later books in the series suggest that they prevent people from forming deep attachments or emotions at all. So why are they not taken until puberty, to prevent children from bonding with the people who raise them but can't be really called "parents"?

However. I've never been one to need dystopian literature to be realistic, and in the case of The Giver adds to the sense of mystery. It is the same for the purposefully up-in-the-air ending. Later books in the series do provide closure as to what happens to Jonas and to Gabriel, the baby Jonas's father had been caring for. However, I almost prefer the way The Giver ends on a note of mystery and wonder.

5 stars for being one of the most powerful books of my childhood/adolescence.


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Monday, July 28, 2014

Perfectionism, Creativity, Crafting, & Bottlecap Magnets

Perfectionism is definitely something I can relate to.While it can get me doing things merely in an effort to impress others, my style of perfectionism is more likely to relentlessly compare myself to others, determine I don't "add" up, and then decide something is not worth the effort because I can't do it as well as so many others. (Graduate school was an especially tough time for me regarding this, by the way). Obviously, this is a very limiting habit to have, and I often find it competing with my desire to create. Perfectionism in fact feels to me like the enemy of creativity, of taking risk, trying new things, or doing things from the sheer love of doing them rather than out of a need for illusive perfection.

So I'm trying to feed my inner creativity and starve my perfectionism. As noted previously, I like to dabble in crafts. I'm not a craft blogger and don't intend to be. For one thing, my camera phone and photography skills are a little lacking. However, I enjoy making things, and since I have a blog AND a Pinterest account, I can share them with people just to share something that makes me happy, not in an effort to compete. Yeah, there are so many people out there so much "better" at crafting than me, but that's ok.

My current/ongoing project is bottle cap magnets, pictured below.

You may have seen various bottle cap products in stores, from magnets to key chains. You can decorate the front or the back of bottle caps (from old beer or old-fashioned soda bottles, yay for recycling!) with anything from photos to rhinestones to scrapbook paper.

The ones I make are pretty simplistic, actually, and I double the recycling effect by finding pictures that appeal to me from old magazines. You can even use old junk mail images. Then I just cut the image into a circle the size of the bottle cap, fold it slightly around the inside of the bottle cap and glue it. Craft stores carry pre-cut magnets with adhesive on one side, so I just stick that on the back and stick the magnet on the fridge. Simple, cheap, and fun!

Some of mine are a bit messier looking because I used too much glue, making the paper bubble up. For a smoother,  more professional effect, you can buy Epoxy Dots and stick them on top of your image. Or make them the cheap and easy way, like I do. :). Either way, these magnets are a fun way to personalize your fridge, and they make great gifts too.
bottle cap magnets

 

Saturday, June 28, 2014

In Pursuit of Health: Weight Vs. Total Fitness

This post brought to you by a friend of mine's wanting to lose weight even though she's at a perfectly healthy BMI. Granted, her choices are her choices, and she seems in control enough and to have a healthy enough perspective to not push any weight loss too far. However, when someone thinner than me (for the record, at around 140 pounds and 5 foot 1, I've just crossed into that "overweight" category) is dissatisfied with their body to the point of wanting to diet...I can't help but cringe inside.

I cringe because I feel that somehow we've lost sight of the true goal of health and have put the focus all on a number on a scale, which is a rather lacking (or at least limited) measure of health imo. I cringe because as a woman I see this obsessive focus on pursuit of the "ideal body" all around me. The distorted images are all around in the media, and while I think most people know that these ideals are 1) not attainable to most and 2) not even necessarily a reflection of a model's reality, we've still bought into the lie that a healthy body has to look a certain way.

There's something almost subversive about declaring acceptance for one's body as it is. If a woman (especially, but men can struggle with this too) says that, people respond like she is "letting herself go" and doesn't care about her health. But paradoxically, if we treat our bodies right, we will arrive at the weight that's healthy for us. And care for our bodies begins first with acceptance. I love the approach of Health at Any Size - the pursuit of health rather than thinness. I'd also like to give a shout-out to dietician Rebecca Scritchfield (a fellow JHU MA in Communications alum!) for embracing these ideals.

It is easier said than done. I admittedly would be happy to lose weight myself. It's not something I'm actively striving for, however. That is partially because when I do strive to lose weight, it doesn't happen, but when I don't (like suffering a mild depressive bought and losing my appetite) that's when I end up losing the pounds. I can't help but think that's not healthy. But yes, I would like flatter abs, a more toned back, and to be "safely" within the "normal" BMI again (all my weight goes to my mid-section, and of course my chest.

But what I am trying to strive for is health - health in all forms, mental, emotional, and spiritual included. Health to me means nurturing my body instead of trying to mold it into something it's not. It means being active and moving my body as it was meant to move. It means feeding it when it's hungry (no deprivation diets!) and fueling it with healthy, nurturing things. It means allowing myself treats, but recognizing that some of the stuff I put in my body is just empty, useless calories - I'm looking at you, Mountain Dew I gulped on an empty stomach for a quick caffeine fix the other day. It means getting adequate rest, allowing myself down time when I need it - not pushing myself beyond my limits in an effort to "master" my body. And when I treat my body right, I feel better, and, I believe, look better.

It goes against American ideals to say this, but so much about our bodies isn't really in our control anyway. I'm short and busty - this is the body I was given. While I can tone through fitness or diet to try to bring down my weight, that only goes so far. So I choose to embrace the body I was given, to nurture it into the fullness of health.

Thursday, June 26, 2014

Goodreads Review: The Silver Linings Playbook

The Silver Linings PlaybookThe Silver Linings Playbook by Matthew Quick
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

So Ken does movie reviews and I do the reviews of books-turned-to-movies...

I wanted to see the enormously popular film version of The Silver Linings Playbook starring Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence, but of course never got around to it. But as soon as I discovered it was a book before it was a film, I put the novel on my reading list. I still haven't gotten around to seeing the movie, but the book is every bit as sweet and quirky as the movie trailers seemed. With his debut novel, Matthew Quick has created what is at one part love story, one part compassionate take on mental illness, one part look at the passions of Philadelphia Eagles fans, and all parts addictively readable story about the silver linings that aren't the ones we are expecting.

The novel's main strength is its narration, as it gets inside the head of a mentally unstable but endearingly optimistic and goodhearted man. When The Silver Linings Playbook begins, narrator Pat Peoples has just returned to his parents' house in New Jersey upon his release from what he calls "the bad place," a Baltimore mental institution. In the film, Pat's diagnosis is bipolar disorder, but the novel does not give Pat a diagnosis. It is obvious, however, that he is quite out of touch with reality, to the point of having no sense of how long he spent in the institution. Despite this and his tendency to outbursts of violence upon hearing Kenny G music, Pat is determined to better himself, and the trip Quick gives the reader inside this character's psyche is compassionate and respectful, humorous and at times hilarious without being condescending.

As the novel's title suggests, Pat is devoted to a philosophy of silver linings and unfettered optimism. Headless of what everyone around him says, his one goal upon returning home is reunion with his estranged wife, Nikki. But then he meets Tiffany, a recently widowed woman with demons of her own, who is set on changing Pat's life in ways he hadn't anticipated.

In his effort to woo back English teacher Nikki, Pat begins reading classic literature, from The Great Gatsby to The Scarlet Letter to The Bell Jar, and his interpretation of these novels according to his silver linings philosophy is in my mind a brilliant way for Quick to establish Pat's worldview and his mental state.

While we don't receive the same opportunity to live inside the heads of the other characters, they are equally easy to root for, or at times to want to scream at. Tiffany is sullen and foul-mouthed and yet obviously sensitive and vulnerable as well. Pat's mom is patient, strong, and compassionate, while his dad is temperamental and distant and bases his moods and treatment of his loved ones upon how the Eagles are doing. I even developed a strong picture of Nikki in my head through Pat's detailed stories and descriptions. Some characters, like Pat's therapist Cliff, who also happens to be an Eagles fan and his "black friend" Danny, seem less well-rounded and believable, but they too are memorable.

Non-football fans may not be interested in the large number of scenes in the novel dealing with the Philadelphia Eagles, but this serves to ground the book in time and place and makes Pat's character (although maybe not his over-the-top father's) seem more believable. The Eagles, win or lose, play as much of a role in Pat's life outside the mental institution as Tiffany does and as Nikki did in his old life.

As the novel unfolds, Pat slowly comes to grips with what brought him to the mental institution and with the new reality of his. While his story does not have the happy ending he was expecting, reunion with Nikki, it nevertheless affirms love and silver linings. It is not the conventional happy-ending-fairy-tale type story, but that's what makes The Silver Linings Playbook so refreshing, believable, and true.

I would rank the novel 4.5 out of 5 stars, but since Goodreads doesn't allow for half-stars, 4 stars it is.

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Friday, June 13, 2014

Father's Day Gift: Painted Ceramic Mushroom

I have realized that my need for creativity needs many more outlets, or rather, it needs to be put into practice more. Michael's Crafts (or really any craft store, Michael's just happens to be my most frequented) is a goldmine for the kind of crafty projects I wish I were doing more of. Holidays of all kinds, however, bring out my inner crafty girl for many reasons, the main one being that handmade gifts are usually both more affordable and more fun than their store-bought counterparts.

And so I made this painted ceramic mushroom garden thingamajig for a Fathers' Day gift. Perfect for my gardening lover dad, perfect for my budget and my need to be creative/crafty.

These whimsical ceramic mushrooms, along with owls, gnomes, and the like, are popping up wherever garden gifts and supplies are sold, but they are often upwards of $20, whereas a plain ceramic mushroom at Michael's was only $3.99. I already had acrylic paints, so I used those to paint mine. It's easy to customize with any colors/patterns you like.

That's really all you need to make a gift that is fun, whimsical, creative and personal for any garden/decorating lover in your life.

Tuesday, April 8, 2014

Dollar Stores Rule...What to Buy

Awhile ago, my friend Athena wrote a facebook note about what she buys and does not buy at the dollar store. As someone on a budget, dollar stores are awesome, and so I thought I'd write my own list of what's worth buying there. This is part my own opinion based on personal experience and part based on general value: what my seem like a great deal may not be if you consider price vs. amount. Finally, this is based on my experiences at Dollar Tree - unlike some "dollar stores" which are really just discount stores, everything at Dollar Tree really is just $1.

So, what to buy? As most people on a budget know, some things it's good to be cheap on, while some things a better-quality or value product is worth the splurge. Overall, though, I've found Dollar Tree to be great for basic household and toiletry items. Here's what I buy, and what I pass on:

Good Buys

Household Goods

Their dish liquids and detergents and laundry detergents have worked well for me, and are great cost savers when compared to purchasing them at a big box store or grocery store. I haven't used any of their other cleaning supplies, and depending on the product, it might be worth spending more elsewhere. 

Athena disagreed with me here, saying that she thought Dollar Tree paper towels were too flimsy, but they have suited my needs, as have zip-lock plastic bags. 

I've never bought their Tupperware, but it seems to be a good value. 

So do many of their home organization goods. I have two mesh laundry bags I bought a few months ago. Admittedly, one has been accumulating holes at the top, but that's probably due to me overfilling it. 

Also, lint rollers. And plastic hangers.

Office Supplies

I definitely choose the dollar store over Staples and the like for basic office supplies like pens/pencils, envelopes, etc.  Any teachers out there who need to purchase classroom supplies out of their own pocket? Dollar Store to the rescue.

Toiletries

Toothbrushes are definitely a thing to buy at the dollar store! Dollar Tree carries toothbrushes from brands like Colgate, and less familiar brands in packs of two or three. 

My hairbrush is also from the dollar store - don't knock it.

Dental floss, mouthwash, and hand soap are also good buys.

Gifts

The dollar store can be a decent place for gifts, depending on your budget, the recipient, and the occasion. Or for party favors - normally I would spend a bit more on a "nicer" gift, but a mug from the dollar store for that co-worker you feel obligated to get a Christmas gift for? Why not? Also, greeting cards are a great bargain at the dollar store - compare a card for $1 to a $3.99 Hallmark card. At Christmas they have boxes of cards as well.

Pass On:

Most Food Items 

My dad once bought a bag of shredded "cheese" from the Dollar Tree. "Cheese" is in quotes because the cheese was so processed as to be less "cheese" than "cheese product", and came complete with a warning that "this product is not intended to melt."

So, yeah, the Dollar Tree does have a large freezer section and a smaller refrigerated section, as well as non-perishable foods, but it's mostly processed crap. I do buy their Arizona Iced Teas, as well as a few other beverages, and their frozen garlic bread isn't all bad. They've got bargains on brand name candy, too. Other than that, though? Pass.

Most Pet Items

Pet toys are fine, and their cat food I've purchased in a pinch, but their pet food is limited and not great quality or value.

Cosmetics, Bath & Body, and Feminine Care, Depending on Personal Preferences

There are some cosmetic and bath and body products I've liked from the dollar store. Nail polish remover? Fine. Their mascara and chap stick suit me fine, too. But their selection of other cosmetics is limited, and, in my experience, not great (tried their nail polish once, but I'd much sooner purchase a moderately-priced brand like Revlon over dollar store stuff).

I don't buy their shampoos either. I usually stick with my $4.00 or so Herbal Essences, but even if I didn't, there are other better deals on shampoo/conditioner out there. For instance, Dollar Tree carries V05, but I found the comparable Suave for only 89 cents a bottle at Target.

Any males reading this who find this TMI or irrelevant, you can skip this paragraph...but I have purchased tampons and pads at the dollar store. However, the boxes are small and they only carry store brands. I think our lady parts are worth more of a splurge.

I do like some of the dollar store body washes and lotions, however.

I would write on what to buy at thrift stores, but I'll buy pretty much anything, minus underwear or swimwear (eww) there.

  
 

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Oh, Pedestrians...

This is just one of those short rants that I considered posting on Facebook, but then decided against it. But we all, myself included, need to just rant some times, and this blog is turning out to be almost as neglected as my old livejournal is, so I thought this would be the space for it.

The subject? Pedestrians. Now, walking is great, and given that this country is known for both a highly sedentary lifestyle and pollution caused by over-dependence on vehicles, I'm glad to see people walking. But the walkers in my area (suburban PG County, MD) just don't have much sense. They ignore perfectly good, clear sidewalks to walk in the street instead. These aren't high-traffic areas, but it's still unnerving as a driver having to share road-space with people who should be utilizing the sidewalks made for them. It's for your own safety, people!!

What really brought about this rant was seeing, on the outskirts of my neighborhood, three men walking abreast right down the center of the street. I had to go illegally pass in the opposing lane to go around them. Again, this wasn't an extremely high traffic area - a semi-residential road with speed bumps and a 25 mile-per-hour speed limit. But still. There were no sidewalks, but in that case, the shoulder is perfectly appropriate walking space. The middle of the road is not.

 Aargh. It's even worse in cities. In both Baltimore and DC (where I have been a pedestrian as well as a driver), pedestrians are all too eager to ignore the signals in the cross-walks and act like the road (rather than the sidewalks) belong to them.

Just think of this as a little public service announcement. Keep on walkin', just do so in walking-appropriate spaces, and when it's your turn to walk.

In other news, it's now officially spring, and yet again there is snow (freezing rain? sleet? wintry mix?) forecasted for Tuesday. Get it together, mother nature.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Goodreads Book Review: Divergent

Divergent (Divergent, #1)Divergent by Veronica Roth
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Susan Collins' enormously popular Hunger Games trilogy seems to have sparked the trend of dystopian teen novel-turned-film. I can't speak for the yet-to-be-released film version of Divergent, but Veronica Roth's novel Divergent, also the first in a trilogy, has many of the factors that made The Hunger Games so popular: a fascinating dystopian setting, a strong and courageous female protagonist, and both plenty of action (and, yes, violence) and internal turmoil.

Sixteen-year-old Beatrice lives in Chicago, where all of society is divided into 5 factions intent on cultivating a specific virtue. For the Erudite it's knowledge, for the Dauntless it is bravery, for Amity it is peacefulness, for Candor it is honesty, and for the faction in which Beatrice has grown up, Abnegation, it is selflessness. As the novel opens, Beatrice and her brother, Caleb, prepare to take a test that will help determine where they truly belong and which faction they should, after a formal initiation process, devote their life to. It is "faction over family," they are told.

But Beatrice's test results reveal something unusual: she is "divergent," and as such is considered dangerous.

Not fully understanding what her divergence means, Beatrice, who adopts the nickname Tris, decides to leave Abnegation for the Dauntless and begins a grueling initiation process in which she tests the limits of her courage, attempts to learn who to trust, and comes to realize that the society she lives in is not as perfect, or as safe, as she had though.

Divergent is written for teens, but its content makes it an engrossing read for adults as well. It may not be appropriate for younger teens, as the violence approaches Hunger Games levels. It is a quick, fast-paced read, but thematically heavier than most teen-oriented books. Roth's use of imagery makes the novel come alive for the reader; she incorporates real landmarks such as the Ferris Wheel into a crumbling, dystopian Chicago. While some of the habits of the various factions verge on stereotype (the Dauntless are all tattooed, and the Erudite wear glasses even if they don't have vision problems), these details also bring Tris' world to life.

As fast-paced as Divergent is, Roth manages to incorporate deeper themes along with the non-stop action. The novel will leave readers pondering everything from the nature of bravery to the pitfalls of cultivating certain virtues at the expense of others to the futility of trying to cultivate the "perfect" society.

The one thing I wasn't such a fan of was the budding romance between Tris and her Divergent leader, "Four." It wasn't as bad as Twilight's Bella and Edward, but Four never seems to be that...well...nice to Tris. Yes, it is largely under the guise of him being the "tough leader" trying to draw out Tris' courage, but even after he confesses his feelings for her, things like him grabbing her wrist to hold her back or calling her an idiot grated on me. Four is otherwise an admirable character in many ways, with a vision for what his faction and society could be, but his relationship with Tris bugged me. But that relationship is a relatively minor part of the book, so I can let it slide.

I'm curious to see how successfully Divergent will be adapted to the big screen. If you are interested in dystopian fiction, see the movie, but definitely read the book!

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Monday, February 3, 2014

2014 Superbowl Commericals

Because a good high school friend of mine has moved to Denver, I feel a connection to the city I have still yet to visit. And so I had to root for the Broncos in the Super Bowl. So their loss to the Seahawks 8-43? Big. Disappointment. The ads were somewhat better, although few really stood out to me this year. I found some of the more serious ads to be more effective and memorable than those that went for the funny factor. I didn't feel like coming up with a whole top-ten list this time, but here are some of the ads that did catch my attention...

With his evangelical faith worn on his sleeve and debatable football talent, Tim Tebow has been a polarizing figure. But his Super Bowl ad shows that he's got a sense of humor about himself. Check out all Tebow's done without a contract:



The Cheerios commercial featuring the multiracial family deserves a shout-out to make up for the crazy backlash the original ad received. Come on, people, it's 2014 already. The Super Bowl spot wasn't the most clever or unique ad, but this (growing!) Cheerios-eating family is as adorable and heartwarming as ever.


John Stamos has already been featured in ads for Dannon Oikos Greek yogurt. But for the Super Bowl he reunited with "Full House" castmates Bob Saget and Dave Coulier for a bit of nostalgic brilliance.


Toyota Highlander featured the Muppets in their Super Bowl spot, and who doesn't love the Muppets?



Chrysler featured Bob Dylan praising the tradition of American-made automobiles.
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Oddly enough, many of Budweiser's Clydesdale ads seem to appeal to a more female-dominated audience. This one, featuring clydesdales, puppies, and Passenger's song "Let Her Go" is another tearjerker

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Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Goodreads Book Review: The Storyteller

The StorytellerThe Storyteller by Jodi Picoult
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I had already written a short Goodreads review of Jodi Picoult's "The Storyteller." However, I'm going back and writing a longer review because I wanted to post it on my blog. So here goes...

I'm a fan of Jodi Picoult's work, and I've read most of her books. I love that she deals with complex, controversial, usually contemporary social and ethical issues from multiple, nuanced perspectives. There are many shades of gray (not those shades) in Picoult's exploration of issues. However, she does tend to be formulaic (virtually every novel has a "surprise" twist at the end) and a bit cheesy at times (read the obligatory romance between detective and client). So I wasn't sure what to think of her delving into the Holocaust with "The Storyteller." Fortunately, in the harrowing portions of the novel depicted from the point of a young woman deported to a Polish ghetto and then Auschwitz, she drops most of her usual tropes and her writing is at its absolute best.

Like most of Picoult's novels, "The Storyteller" is told from multiple perspectives. It opens in modern-day New Hampshire, where Sage Singer is a young culturally Jewish woman with scars both physical and emotional. Eschewing most social contact, she works nights as a baker. At a grief support group, she meets an elderly German man who tells her his name is Josef. Sensing that they each carry scars and remorse, Sage and Josef form an unlikely friendship. Then Josef confesses the unthinkable: he was a Nazi SS officer, and he wants Sage to help him end his life.

As the shocked Sage comes to terms with what Josef has told her and asked of her, she delves not only into issues of justice and forgiveness, good and evil, but also into her own past, family history, and personal identity.

Josef's revelation has personal significance to her because her grandmother, Minka, is a Holocaust survivor. Piccoult narrates several chapters from the young Minka's perspective, and her writing in these chapters is clear, sharp, and heartbreaking. Minka is a woman of incredible courage and resilience,and the reader naturally roots for her as her world is uprooted at the tender age of 18. Piccoult minces no words in describing the horrors Minka endured, but she shows how Minka's cleverness and her friendship with another young Jewish woman helped her maintain her humanity.

It's clear that Minka, a budding writer, is "the storyteller" of the title, and in some ways she is a more central character than even Sage. Strewn throughout the novel are bits of a fantasy story Minka writes about two brothers who are upiors, or Polish vampires. These bits of the novel are a bit confusing at first, as they are scattered throughout the book, but once the reader realizes what they are it is clear how they fit with the larger story. Yes, vampires have become cliche in our post-Twilight world, but Minka's vampire story seems to deal with themes, like whether evil is inevitable or can be turned into good, that Stefanie Myer tried less successfully to explore.

The chapters of "The Storyteller" that take place in the current age are slightly less effective, as Picoult resorts to some of her favorite formulas. A romance between Sage and Leo, the FBI detective she contacts to help her deal with Josef, is unrealistically paced, and much of Leo's dialogue and narration is heavy on the Velveeta. Some of the minor characters, like bakery owner Mary, are compelling, but some, like the bakery employee who only speaks in Haiku, are pointless, unbelievable stock characters that don't really serve any purpose. And Sage's character is not nearly thoroughly developed enough. While the reader knows that she has both minimal self-esteem and burdens of guilt and remorse, Picoult does not reveal why until more than halfway into the novel. As a result, Sage just comes across as whiny and self-interested for much of the novel. While Josef's revelations launch an inner transformation in Sage, this seems to happen far too quickly with the causes of Sage's anguish and inner turmoil not fully explored.

Of course, like all Picoult novels, "The Storyteller" ends with a twist, and it was a twist I did not see coming. Sometimes Picoult's twist endings seem forced, but this one leaves the reader with a lack of closure that is integral to the story. Parts of "The Storyteller" may be difficult to read, but it is a book that will leave you thinking long after you put it down.



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