I've had lots of things on my mind lately that I've thought about blogging about, but of course I never found or made time for it. So I'm just gonna make this a post about the smorgasborg of topics that have been on my mind, some of them from a little while ago.
Shuttin' It Down
Yeah, the government went and shut itself down for more than two weeks, because compromise and working things out in a mature fashion are apparently for kindergardeners.
Much has already been said about the few fringe crazies trying to hold our government hostage. Too much, probably. The good elected officials need far more recognition than they get and shouldn't have their reputations tarnished by the bad ones. So a shoutout to
Chris Van Hollen, Representative from my homestate of MD, is in order.
Gun Control or Why Can't We Regulate Guns Like Cars
On to another fun political topic: gun control. I thought about posting on this after the tragic Navy Yard shooting a month or so ago, but it's probably good that I didn't get around to it right away. There needed to be time for people to process the tragedy before jumping straight into heavily politicized issues, yes. However, these issues come up every time one of these mass shootings happens, and they happen all too frequently. And people never actually get around to dealing with the issues that perhaps could minimize the frequency of the tragedy.
Like better regulating of guns. The problem to me seems to be the all-or-nothing approach people take with the issue, especially those who constantly cite the Second Ammendment. We can regulate guns while still maintaining a Constitutional right to bear them - responsibly.
Sort of like we do with cars. Just in terms of owning a car, there's the registation requirements. And then the licencing requirements and finally the actual rules of operating a vehicle on the roads. Some of these regulations are a pain in the ass (looking at you, PG County school zone cameras), but mostly I accept them uncomplainingly as the cost of operating a potentially dangerous machine. And while of course people break the laws and vehicle accidents do still occur, the laws for the most part do actually reduce injuries and fatalities. I don't understand why we can't take the same approach toward regulating (
not banning) an instrument actually designed to maim and kill.
Babies
My cousin had one about a month ago. And you know what, I'm a little jealous of her. Baby Caroline, that is.
Yes, I said it. I'm jealous of babies. Not because they don't do much besides eat and sleep and soil their diapers, but because they don't do much besides eat and sleep and soil their diapers, and they are so appreciated just for existing. Not because of their accomplishments or talents or what they can give, but just because they
are. I think that's something that's often forgotten in adult relationships, and it took observing people as they interacted with my cousin's baby to really notice and pin-point it.
We try, yes, to appreciate our adult loved ones for who they are, but so often, at least in my experience, that gets lost in seeing people for what they can give us or what they say about us, or in constant approval seeking and people pleasing in an attempt to get love. Simple, unadulterated love, the kind bestowed so easily upon babies.
Parents and Parenting Methods
Related to the topic of babies is the myriad of "parenting methods" that exist today. I'm not a parent, but I never understood the need to put labels on one's parenting style. It just seems to make it harder to parent in a way that is unique to one's own situation and child's needs, and to contribute to the endless "mommy wars." But between my cousin's new baby and reading a book by a Chinese-American author called
Tiger Babies Strike back, it got me thinking about my own upbringing and parental issues that I still face as an adult child.
I love my parents, and on the whole I think I was pretty lucky - I was never abused or neglected. But there were and are still some issues, especially with my mother. She had little moments of Asian-style "tiger mothering," but she tended more toward "helicoptering." And still does. That's right, when something stresses her out, even if it is my issue or my brother's and not hers, she hovers, which takes the form of nagging or over-control.
One example is a couple years ago when she harassed me about doing my taxes after I admitted I had procrastinated on them. It was just like...argh, I know when my taxes are due, and even if I put them off, it doesn't mean I won't make the deadline, and if I do, that is my issue and not my mother's.
The thing is I know where my mother is coming from when she behaves like this, to an extent; it's her way of trying to manage things that goes way back to her own semi-dysfunctional childhood. But it's still extremely frustrating and even as an adult I don't really know how to appropriately tell her when to back of or what's mine to deal with vs. my mother's.
Body Image, Size Acceptance, Diet and Exercise
And then there's my father. Love him too, but he seems to be becoming more critical of me the older he gets. Which brings me to my next topic. My dad, in a completely well-meaning way, told me recently that I need to "watch my weight, because it will become more of a problem when I get older." Or something along those lines.
Now, I'm a friggin' size six, not near obese. I've been trying to exercise more and to eat healthier lately, but I've never wanted the focus to be on a number on a scale, but on healthy
behaviors.
It just seems that the lines between "fighting obesity" through healthy lifestyle choices and promoting a very narrow ideal body are very fine sometimes. And that it's better to keep the focus on changing behavior to treat your body well than to try to
change your body.
So, yeah, I guess I needed to vent about a few things, but enough rambling for now.
